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Optional Cure for the Common Cold (and it's not soup)

Optional Cure for the Common Cold (and it's not soup)

By the end of pregnancy most women are begging for mercy. All they want is to go into labor yesterday. The prolonged discomfort causes them to hasten what could possibly be the most uncomfortable situation of their lives, delivery. Labor and delivery is preferable to perpetual pregnancy and once you are anywhere near your due date, you start wondering if perpetual pregnancy is an option.

One of the reasons that pregnancy is so uncomfortable is that you can't do much to alleviate the other discomforts that have nothing to do with pregnancy. When I was pregnant with my third son, in the spring of 2014,  I got a really bad head cold. I just couldn't shake it and there isn't really any cold medicine a pregnant woman can take to alleviate it.

Ryan felt bad for me. His co-workers would ask how I was doing and they began to also feel for the poor sick pregnant women with four other children to care for on top of a nasty cold.

They sent help. They sent help in the form of a sinus flusher. It is a squeeze bottle that you add a mild saline solution to and squirt up one nostril. The solution squirts up that one nostril through the sinus and out the other nostril. You use it to flush everything out, especially helpful when you can't use any medication to loosen things up.

I was reluctant to try it. I have gotten water up my nose a time or two and that was never an experience that I thought I would like to repeat purposefully. Ryan stopped at the store to pick up the distilled water that the box called for and got it all set up for me. He was insistent. It was either this or take me out back and put me out of my misery. He assured me all the ladies at work swear by it.

I finally agreed to give it a shot and shot it did. It shot straight up one nostril and out the other in a horrifying burst of burning and choking. I stepped out of the bathroom and dropped to my knees on my kitchen floor. Jesus Take the Wheel, by Carrie Underwood began playing in my head, clearly I had steered myself in the wrong direction. 

I was crying. Real tears were pouring down my cheeks. 'That was the worst thing that has happened to me,' I screamed. Now, I am pregnant with my third child remember. I have felt things, difficult things. 'Why do your co-workers hate me! Make it stop!' It felt like my face was being torched from the inside out.

Ryan was not so impressed by my dramatic display. To prove to me that I was being totally ridiculous, he too gave the sinus flusher a go. To be clear he saw me writhing in agony on the floor, and decided to flush his sinus cavity anyway.  

He too hit his knees beside me. That's where we looked long and hard at each other and began reevaluating all of our life choices, starting with, but not limited to, the flushing our sinuses. "I thought my co-workers were good people, but evil is in their hearts." He may have had a tear or two welling in his eyes. We were holding hands.

Where do we go from here? There was no undoing what had just occurred. 

The children witnessed the whole thing. There was a lot of quiet eye blinking and nervous laughter. They knew that getting water up the nose is no fun. Many a bath-time had been ruined by wayward drops of water. They warned me that I was walking a dangerous road by forcefully squirting the contents of that bottle into my nose.

They tried to talk me out of it. "Mommy, don't squirt that up your nose," they had begged.  Oh, the wisdom of babes. What's done is done. They were doubly shocked that Ryan, when seeing me in my aftermath, joined me. At least they now know for certain that daddy and I stick together. If this ship sinks, we sink united. Adam&Eve with an apple eating.  Bonnie&Clyde with criminal activity. Ryan&Amie with sinus cleansing.

Here's a fun fact. Remember how the box called for distilled water. Ryan inadvertently grabbed distilled white vinegar. That's how we both ended up with the angriest nasal passages known to man.

Lots of things can be 'distilled.' Water, vinegar, alcohol, ect....all can be distilled.

Distill according to the dictionary means: to subject to a process of vaporization and subsequent condensation, as for purification or extract the essential elements of; refine

Glad to know that the vinegar coursing through those delicate nose parts of mine was in it's most pure and concentrated form. I would like to now assure you that no real damage was done. We can still smell things and taste. It was touch and go for little while (i.e. 2 weeks). I venture to guess that our nasals are cleaner than most, but do I need to tell you not to do this? Don't do it! I don't think I had a cold after that. I had other problems, but I think the cold virus died. 

Listen to the cries of my children and never stick anything into your delicate nose parts unless it's a small toy or fingertip. Never mind, take no advice from my children or Ryan's coworkers on putting things up your nose. Just don't. Read labels carefully. Live a good and happy life. Ryan's coworkers are good people. This one's on us. Ryan wanted to take a vow of silence on this story. I didn't agree. I couldn't agree. Somethings just need to be said. This experience is part of my authentic truth.

Even though you now know I might not be the brightest twinkly light, can I break this down for you a little? Can I pretend that squirting vinegar nearly up into my brain gave me some life wisdom to pass along? When you have housed distilled white vinegar in your sinus cavity, you've been through something. I believe that all things can be used for the good.

A dear friend and mother was taken by cancer from my life and the lives of her loved ones far too early. When her young son was asked what he missed about his mommy his simple answer was, 'She helped me put on my shoes.' That always puts a knot in my throat. Helping get shoes to cover tiny toes is such a mommy thing to do. Their pudgy little fingers don't cooperate just yet in allowing them to accomplish this simple necessary task for themselves. It is actually a vulnerable moment. Imagine someone putting your shoes on for you right now because you are unable to do that for yourself.

In the hurry and frustration of most attempts at leaving the house, I would hate to think that helping my kids put on their shoes would be the memory that they take with them should we ever be separated. I am not usually my best at that moment.  I am frazzled and harried.

Just as Ryan and I needed to reevaluate where our life was headed while vinegar was assaulting the backside of our faces, we all could use some reevaluating in our life.

Our days need some distilling. Especially our days with our kids. We are busy! Do we get to spend quality time with the people we claim as most important? Do we spend enough time on the purpose we are most passionate about? Are we overly distracted? Are we in a big hurry, rushing ourselves and our people?

The act of serving my children in the simple and frazzled moments, needs distilling for me. If I can let the task of helping my children get shoes on distill down to the one thing it really is, loving service, I might enjoy it. I might be patient in it.  I might appreciate the moment rather than be frustrated by it. And if heaven forbid, I am separated from my children much earlier than I wish, I would be proud that one of their fond memories of me, was helping them with their shoes. I pray that my children remember me as one who lovingly, patiently served them. I am glad for my friend that her loving service is something that she is fondly remembered for.

So how do you do that? How do you distill those problematic parts of your life back down to their simplest, most enjoyable form? I don't pretend to be an expert. There are parts of my life that I would enjoy more if I focused on them one at a time. Maybe the illusion of multitasking is part of the problem. We try to get too many things done at one time and are frustrated when we can't, nothing is getting done well, or everything is taking way to long to complete.

I'm working on not multitasking as much (just reading, just cooking, just eating). Distilling. 

I think the term 'distill' is going to keep swirling in my mind for a bit. Guess that makes sense, the vinegar took a couple of weeks to fully fade.

Thanks for reading! 



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